Hard to believe we are 8 days into February already. Even still, winter seems to be d r a g g i n g! The kids really enjoyed the foot of snow we got the other week. Though they were bummed they didn't get "snow days" like all the public school kids. I reminded them they will thank me when they are done with school in May! Even though they still had to do school work, the kids had plenty of time to play in the snow. They made snowmen, 6 of varing sizes to be exact. One representing each of the kids including the new baby.

Kevin took them out one day and made 3 huge snow forts. Not sure what possessed me, but I gave the kids bottles of water with food coloing in them to "paint" the forts. Needless to say it looked like a box of fruit loops threw up in our front yard (for all the neighbors to see of course!) haha Oh well, the kids had a blast and that's all that mattered.

Thank you to the many of you who either sent me messages or talked to me in person about those links I shared the other week. I am glad they helped put into words what I just couldn't seem to express. I also appreciated the prayers & support I received after I shared. I certainly can't travel this journey on my own & am thankful to have others who reach out and help me during the tough days still.

A friend who was encouraging me shared the following in an article she was reading about grief & thought it also described what she has seen others & myself go through. So I wanted to share it here as it was another good description:

The experience of grief is lifelong – it does not go away after a certain amount of time. Yes, it softens but always there is a place in your heart and your soul that yearns for that child.

There are no stages to grief – it is not that organized of a process. Rather, grief is like entering chaos, with emotions and experiences swirling about you in such a way that normal life feels impossible at times. The job of grief is to re-order the chaos – and that takes time – a long time.

We are familiar with the sorrow of grief, but it is so much more than that. Grief is emotional – overwhelming sorrow, a raging anger, guilt at what was undone or unsaid. Grief also impacts our minds. It is normal to be confused, and have trouble remembering things. Grief is physical – people who are grieving tend to be very tired and yet sleep is often hard. It is normal to have physical symptoms of grief.

 Grief impacts our abilities and desire to interact with others. It all seems so meaningless – and somehow wrong that normal life is going on when something so terrible has happened. A bereaved parent’s world has stopped – and yet everyone else goes forward. It is an isolating experience to lose a child.

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