Capturing Your Grief Day 13: Signs

I view this as signs from Heaven, ways God is letting me know that Noah is still involved and a part of our daily life and a reminder than they both love us.

There have been lots of big & little signs these last 2 years. I'll just share a few. The other month we had this beautiful butterfly that came and sat in our garage on a broom and wouldn't leave. We needed to run some errands and I didn't want it trapped in the garage but it wouldn't leave no matter what we tried. When we came home, the butterfly was still in the same spot. We eventually got it to fly outside to a bush right by Noah's rosebush and it sat there for several hours before eventually flying off. The day this happened was on the 13th. Noah was born on the 13th.

This past April, a dear friend of mine was giving birth to her precious son Weston who wasn't going to live very long. He was born & later died on the 14th (Noah died on the 14th as well). That morning, which I didn't know till later but it would've been around the time Weston died, I got a whiff of Noah on my hands. I can't explain it but it smelled I had chills. We were outside doing some yard work as a family. I didn't say anything but called the others over & stuck out my hands and said take a smell. Susan didn't miss a beat and she said that smells just like Noah!!!! Which confirmed my thoughts exactly & that I wasn't imagining it. The others couldn't believe it and didn't stop sniffing my hands. Admittedly I didn't either. I didn't wash them for many hours, not until after his scent was gone. Call it what you want, but I hadn't smelled Noah that strong since he had last been in my arms. I don't think it was a coincidence on the timing nor the day. I'd love for that to happen again someday!

Back in August, I blogged about the Travels of Noah's balloon which was another neat story!! A balloon a friend released on Noah's birthday traveled about 1200 miles and the details behind who found it & when are pretty special.

One of the biggest signs from above was my rainbow baby. I was due with my rainbow the day Noah died which I felt was a sign in and of itself. But I usually carry close to 2 weeks late. Noah was my "earliest" at 9 days late so I figured I'd carry baby #6 until close to the end of July. Apparently God had a bigger surprise in store and I unexpectedly went into labor early, giving birth to my rainbow baby on Noah's 1st birthday, in the exact same room that Noah was born in & later died in (the nurse had no clue who I was when I came in in labor thus didn't know about the room when she put me in it). Knowing my history & that I should've carried late, there is no doubt that this was the hand of God tying together Noah & Olivia's stories for a bigger purpose.
Noah & Olivia on their shared birthday in the same bed they were both born in


  1. I am so sorry for your loss. I've read other posts you have shared, but this one has a familiar tie to my family. I went with my mom to the cemetery yesterday and shared that I've never really felt connected to loved ones now gone while at the graves. (Not to them personally, but the grave-sites specifically don't evoke nostalgia for me.) Instead, my memories and tears are during everyday things- cleaning out a closet and finding my dad's shirt, recreating Granny's recipes with my girls, and, like you, seeing butterflies. After my niece died every time I saw a butterfly I thought of her. Over 8 years later, I still do. The way you share your story of Noah does bring tears, but also show's God's love beautifully.

  2. Hi Jenn, Tesha sent me along to your blog because we share something more than just having lost precious babies. My rainbow Malachi, arrive nearly 7 weeks ago on his big brother Sebastian's first birthday in Heaven also! The circumstances were also 'of God', as I too was given his b'day as my first due date. This was then moved forward at a scan, but I ended up going a week over that! My last two live births were 39.5 weeks so I wasn't expecting him to come on Seb's birthday at all. But there we were, and that's when God decided was 'the right' time. Something I still don't fully understand, but God took me through the emotions of the possibility of it all in the week before he was born. God is good, and my darling rainbow is perfect and healthy and HERE.
    I will have a look around the rest of your blog now. Your Noah and Olivia are so beautiful though - and she looks a lot like him in that photo of them together!
    God Bless xx

    1. Wow Nat, that's amazing to hear another rainbow was born a year later on their precious brother's birthday!! You are right, it definitely is something special from God that they share that same day. I'm sorry to hear about your sweet Sebastian. (((hugs))) Thankful Malachi is here & healthy. Prayers for you as you continue to walk this journey. Feel free to email me anytime you need a listening ear. Blessings! xx


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