July 2nd

It's Friday which means appointment day. We had our ultrasound first. And once again, Noah is exceeding the doctors expectations!!! Even the tech said as much and was surprised that yet another week has passed and he still looks just like he did weeks ago (except bigger). No hydrops, no heart failure, amniotic level good, etc. YAY!!!!! They have told me ever since we got his diagnosis that his health is going to deteriorate and that we shouldn't be surprised if his health fails and he needs to be taken before his due date. Here I am, 2 days until my due date and quite honestly, I know I am going to be sailing right past it and going late. Noah was facing my back today so we didn't get to see his adorable face. We did get to see his pile of hair though!!

Noah is quite honestly a miracle. Most trisomy 13 babies miscarry in the first trimester with some making it until the 2nd trimester before miscarrying. The fact that he has made it this far AND will probably be late but in still good health is just amazing!!! I am hoping and praying SO HARD that this is an indication that he will hang around for awhile and maybe even let us bring him home. It's so hard going into this trying to keep an open mind about what could happen. The specialist still says we'll be lucky to have only a few minutes with him. But then again, the specialist also said he wouldn't live this long. So I just don't know what to think. I think I am prepared for the worst but desperately hoping & praying for the best.

We went downstairs for my OB checkup. I hadn't yet met this doctor. This practice is so huge you could go an entire pregnancy and only see each person once. Not my sorta thing. I liked when I was with my midwife, the only person I saw for the visit who knew each detail and didn't have to review my chart before seeing me. She said they had a staff meeting this morning and again my "case" (feels so disconnected when they say this) was reviewed. She said they were wondering what my cervix was doing. Made me think my cervix is probably one of the most talked about right now. I told her that last week I asked to have an internal and that the doctor refused because I was 2 days shy of being 39wks and that she claimed she ONLY did them past 39wks. She said WHAT?! I said yeah, I was told the week prior I was going to be checked and possibly have my membranes stripped which this doctor also refused to do. She said no, they should've checked you whenever you asked. She said we are here to do whatever your wishes are. So I was thankful to have finally gotten a doctor who was on the same page as us.

She did an internal and said I am 1cm dialated, 60% effaced and that she could feel Noahs head. She stripped my membranes "agressively" (her words, but holy cow I'd agree!). We set up a schedule for this next week for me to keep going in every few days for my membranes to be stripped again. The scheduling staff couldn't believe I was scheduling out as far as I was, but I said you don't understand, I have a history of going super late!!! I said I have no doubt I will be back next week!! I want to avoid being induced as that is super hard on not only your body but the baby as well. I've gone 2 & 3wks late in the past, so I am ok with the fact that he is taking his time. Every pregnancy, I go into it knowing I will be late, no biggie. I spent several hours after the appointment with pretty steady contractions and pain, which is normal after having your membranes stripped. Thankfully things slowed down and allowed my body to relax after awhile.

So here I sit, thankful & blessed that Noah's health is still stable, but still nervously anticipating the coming week. I can't even wrap my mind around all that is to come, and maybe that's good because I'm already extremely anxious and scared. I just pray that God would allow a short & quick labor. To go through a long and tedious labor only to lose my son seems almost cruel, so I pray God could at least bless me with an easy labor.

2 comments

  1. What a miracle indeed, for him to be thriving so well at this stage. You're in my thoughts and prayers....

    Have a blessed 4th of July Weekend.

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  2. your story is SO touching just know I am praying for you as you face the near future...it IS very hard to face it and I pray you feel God's strengening arms around you...a friend who feels your pain..steph

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